The Meandering Path

Or Why There Isn’t More Advanced Material Available

Alternate alternate title: Better living with plants and Poison Ivy was Right

I know it’s been a while since I wrote anything, so this might get a little rambly. But I kinda wanted to talk about what I’ve been doing and where I’m at and just some conclusions I’ve come to. It has been one hell of a year and all I really want to say about that is that we are definitely living in the bad timeline. But one of the big reasons I’ve not been writing as much (other than life, the universe, and everything), is that time and again, when I have prayed or meditated, the message I’ve gotten has be, “Offerings and prayers at the shrine are nice, but do.” Basically, get out there and live what you preach. So that’s what I’ve been trying to do. I’ve been doing my best to make my tiny corner of the world a little bit better by being more kind to others, by trying to be more considerate and thoughtful. I don’t know how successful I am at it, but I’m trying. Working with Heqet, there is so much love there, and I get the feeling she wants that shared. Love is ma’at, kindness is ma’at. Yes, there’s more to it than that as I often say, but it’s a damn good start to fighting the chaos that threatens to swallow our world. And there is so much chaos right now, everyone is at the end of their rope more than usual.
One of the things I’ve taken up in trying to make my tiny corner a little bit better is gardening. I’d kinda halfassedly tried before, but with the shutdown last year I had the time to really fool with it. And it’s been so much fun! I’ve picked out starters and seed more by intuition and “well, the bees are all over it,”than any real plan, so I’ve wound up with some surprises as a result. I do prefer plants that are at least theoretically useful, whether I use them or not, so I have quite a few herbs and whatnot now. The two biggest surprises so far have been the cosmos and the valerian. Ya’ll, I had never seen cosmos. I didn’t read the seed packet carefully. I was not prepared for flowers as tall as I am, and my dumb ass planted those things in a container. I have never so happily panicked. As for the valerian, well, I thought it died over the winter and not only has it come back to become a small shrub, but it’s got buds all over it. I did not realize it flowered, but I should have. But I’ve learned a lot from playing with plants, and not just gardening tips and tricks. I know it’s stupid hippy new age shit, but it’s really sunk home how divorced from the rest of the planet we’ve become, like, we just don’t spend enough time in nature (at least I sure as heck don’t). And while a garden isn’t nature at it’s wildest, there is something so soothing about just hanging out with the plants. It’s uhhh, very grounding. (I’m sorry, I couldn’t resist.)
But the grounding nature of actually, well, playing in the dirt, and caring for the things that grow in it, it’s not something I’ve really had a chance to do much since I was a kid, and even then I didn’t get to actually plant anything. And when you spend so much time away from that, whether it’s due to being allergic to life, other health issues, work, living in apartments, not having time or money for it, you just kinda lose something and you don’t really realize it’s gone until you get it back. So in a lot of ways, it’s been a really good chance to reconnect.
Of course, as a kemetic, it comes right back around to the gods, who are embodied in everything. Geb is the obvious choice, as a god of the earth, but my lady Heqet and her fertility associations extend past human babies all the way to the earth. As a divine midwife, she helps bring things into the world. And, of course, there’s Osiris, whose agricultural associations may be the strongest of any of our gods. So by experiencing these realms, I get to experience different aspects of my gods, and it is glorious.

This brings me to the other topic I wanted to talk about, and that’s how often we see complaints about how little advanced materials, how little “201” information is out there. Just based on where my own path has led, from the world, to shrines and rituals, and back into the world (there’s still shrines and rituals, of course, but there’s a better balance)…. There’s such a dearth of materials because Kemeticism 201 is a field course–it must be lived and experienced. I mean, sure, you can delve as deep into the history books as you like, and that is certainly to be encouraged. This is not to say that studies in egyptology and learning more about the historical practice of our religion is all 101 stuff. Gods, no, some of those books are graduate level. More like, the history books are Kemeticism 211 (and 311 and 411 and 511), to be taken concurrently with 201. There does simply come a point where you have to start really incorporating everything into your life, though. How you do that is up to you, and I daresay will vary depending on the deities you worship the most and are closest to. It comes down to figuring out how the values and beliefs of kemeticism practically fit into your life and how they affect everything you do and say. It sounds like a lot, and I can already hear some of you saying, “Ugh, really, Helv? I’m already doing that, I make sure to live in ma’at, I’m posting all the right content, I’m supporting all the right causes. I put the shopping cart away, what more do you want from me? Give me what I came here for!” Well, I mean, if you’ve already sorted that out, then you’re past the 201 stuff, now aren’t you? But I would encourage anyone who thinks they have fully incorporated their beliefs into their lives to just take another look and make sure. Are there things you do that support isfet instead of ma’at? Work on those. This is not a one and done kind of thing. If you’re doing it right, you’re constantly growing and changing, just like those plants in my garden. And sometimes that growth and change is very slow, and you don’t notice it until there are buds, or tiny seedlings sprouting. If you ever think you have learned everything there is to learn, and that you don’t need to change anything about yourself, you may as well have died. The good news is, it is never too late to come back from your roots and start growing again. Heck, some plants can grow from just a twig!

But all of this is why there comes a point where all the blogs, and the websites, and videos, and the books just kinda…peter out (well, aside from the hardcore academic stuff). There comes a point where you have to stop reading and watching and you have to do. Those actions, that working things in and finding your niche….It’s boring as fuck to read about and it’s different for everyone. Some people will find their action in research, some in activism, some in writing, and others in a hundred different ways. Many of those ways will be small, and that is okay. There’s that saying, “Don’t sweat the small stuff,” which is good advice for helping with anxiety, but at the same time, what is life but the small stuff? Our lives are like 90% small stuff. Individual small actions may not matter much, but they add up to a lot over time. So allow yourself to experience life, experience the gods in your life, not just in your shrine (although that’s certainly a part of it). Let yourself learn and grow and change.

And when you hit a point where you want to learn more, but can’t find the right books…. Do.